They are everywhere in every community. Husbands abandon their spouses and children. Wives walk out of their husbands’ lives and leave children with devastated emotions. Single mothers give birth to children with no marriage and no father image for support and guidance.
Consider how far removed this is from God’s original plan. God planned for one man and one woman to be joined in marriage to become a “one flesh” union. They are to partner together in true fidelity until death separates them.
Hear what Jesus said, “But from the beginning of the creation God made them male and female. For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and cleave to his wife; and they twain shall be one flesh: . . . What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder” (Mark 10:6-9).
Jesus went on to speak of the sin of divorce and remarrying. “Whosoever shall put away his wife, and marry another, committeth adultery against her. And if a woman shall put away her husband, and be married to another, she committeth adultery.”
These divine mandates by the Saviour of the world are violated wholesale in our society. The violations are approved by nearly all of professed Christianity which has greatly multiplied the problem. Perhaps you, as a reader, are a victim of such a broken relationship. Is there a remedy? Is there hope? Can broken relationships and broken homes be fixed?
What can spouses do when their partners walk out? What can children do when their parents abandon them? These are tough questions. The old adage, “Misery loves company,” provides little comfort. There is a lot of company in the broken home scenario. But it only magnifies the problem rather than fixing it. Here are some steps to finding God’s way.
- Stop and consider that God is greater than any difficulty. In crises, He welcomes us to seek Him and call upon Him. Consider these wonderful promises found in the Bible. God hears the cry of those who are hurting. “Seek ye the LORD while he may be found, call ye upon him while he is near” (Isaiah 55:6). “Call upon me in the day of trouble: I will deliver thee, and thou shalt glorify me” (Psalm 50:15). “Ye shall seek me, and find me, when ye shall search for me with all your heart. And I will be found of you, saith the LORD” (Jeremiah 29:13, 14a).
- Jesus loves you. He died on a cross of wood for your sin (Romans 5:8). “Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light” (Matthew 11:28-30).
- Ask God to make you a better person in the present circumstances. Our first impulse is to strike back or run away. These are negative responses. They will lead to more trouble and disappointment. When you let Jesus come into your life, He will steer you in the right direction. He will empower you to forgive, to love those who may be hurting you. Respond in helpful ways, doing your part to show love in action.
- Seek the help of other Christians. Find someone with whom you can share your struggles. Attend a Bible-believing, Bible-practicing church. Pray privately and with others. Read the Bible regularly.
- Seek restoration. Jesus is the great reconciler. He made peace through the blood of His cross. Jesus wants to work in your life and the life of your loved ones to heal broken relationships. Be willing to say, “I am sorry. I was wrong, forgive me” and “I will do better with God’s help.” Look for something good in others and commend it. Pray for ways you can lighten the burden of others around you. Your own burdens will become more bearable.
- Be convinced that regardless of how bad your situation is, God can make you a person of honor and integrity. In our difficulties, God comes near.
In the Bible, read Jonah, Chapter 2. Jonah cried to God from the belly of a great fish, a most hopeless situation. God brought him deliverance. God allowed the Apostle Paul and his shipmates to face a terrible storm with all hope that they could be saved gone. In that desperate situation, God saved them all (Acts 27).
Read Psalm 40. Note particularly the last verse. “I am poor and needy; yet the Lord thinketh upon me: thou art my help and my deliverer; make no tarrying, O my God.”
Jesus taught that all things are possible through Him though they may be impossible with men. Coping with rejection, abandonment, abuse, anger, and contempt by ourselves is impossible, but not so with God. He sent His Son Jesus Christ to heal the brokenhearted and to set at liberty them that are bruised (Luke 4:18). You can find help from Him this very moment. If you need more help, contact the church or organization named on the back of Reaching Out.